Apparently There Was Some Debate Today?

(it might even still be going on as I write this)

I’ve been informed that a bunch of lecterns with coloured ribbons on them have met for their annual Staring Contest While Standing In A Semi-Circular Shape meeting, which for some reason involves a live studio audience, an adjudicator and BBC coverage. All my friends are into it, and they’re the sort of clever people to spot a trend years before it develops, so look for this meeting to have its own four-season HBO series in a couple years time, in which a lectern is killed off every few episodes in increasingly shocking and tragic circumstances.

For the record, I’ve spent today revising and watching a combination of Machine Gun Kelly’s admittedly rather good Rise Against-influenced Swing Life Away, and Schnappi, Das Kleine Krokodil on repeat. Take that, lecterns.


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