Writing Doesn’t Help Me Write

(writingception?)

I’ve been doing a lot of writing this summer: I’m approaching 50,000 words of my novel, have had pieces accepted for three online magazines, and wrote this little thing about my sexuality yesterday that got more views by itself than the rest of this entire blog in the last six days. But all of these things are disconnected from each other, and rather than encourage me to write more, are actually discouraging.

Take the journalism stuff, for instance; I wrote one article about the Straight Edge movement, something that’s very important to me personally, but it’ll be published on a magazine’s site, rather than being stuck on here. Similarly, I’ve written about Mass Effect and sporting corruption for other sites, things that wouldn’t look out of place in the random, stream of consciousness-like archives on this blog. Equally, I was going to write a review of InFamous: Second Son and stick it on here, rather than put it on The News Hub, which may haveΒ a more specialised gaming audience.

Working on my novel has also been a problem regarding blogging output; my writing blog has been on hiatus for months now, not because I’m not writing, but because I’m working towards a large, unpublished project, rather than a series of small projects that will be published regularly and individually.

I know that I’m not sitting on my arse doing nothing, but I have little of value, or indeed anything, to show for my work (the novel is unfinished, a lot of these magazines’ sites aren’t active yet), which knocks the confidence a bit. So I’m sorry if I’m writing a lot of shit, or apparently little at all, but you’ll just have to bear with me a bit.

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30 thoughts on “Writing Doesn’t Help Me Write

  1. Reblogged this on HarsH ReaLiTy and commented:
    I think it really comes down to enjoyment. Are you getting enjoyment from writing or not? From there the “output” will come eventually. Best of luck on the novel! Keep at it! -OM
    Note: Comments disabled here, please visit their blog.

    1. I’m enjoying it immensely, it’s just weird to write for no obvious output after writing and publishing publicly for the last year and a half solid.

      But thank you! I’ll blog relentlessly about it when it’s closer to being finished.

        1. True, although I’ve yet to find a problem that can’t be solved through more work.

          And thank you πŸ™‚ Also thanks for the reblog – I feel that a lot of your readers have come to see what I’m about, which is very nice of them.

  2. Some days I’m more human than others,and today is one of the positive ones, so I’ll comment.Can you mix it up a little? Dedicate one day to the book. Dedicate the next day to other writing and the blog. It sounds as if you are getting yourself into a state of anxiety. Plan a little bit. Do other things that bring some joy into your life. OP is right when he ask whether or not you are enjoying writing? Some days,granted, it is anguish, but the preponderance of the time should be “looking forward” to writing. We’ll wait.

    1. First up congrats on being more human today πŸ™‚

      I plan to write everything every day, which works most of the time – I find that I need momentum to write, so if I don’t write for a day or two I’ll slip away from writing for like weeks. The more I write, the more I’m able to write. But I love writing full stop, so it’s rarely an obligation or stressful – I was just making an observation about me writing without publishing immediately.

  3. If your followers are truly passionate you don’t have to worry about any hiatus just sit back and relax with your own pace. If you need gratification there’s surely someone around you can show your work to before its even published to get you going a bit. Keep up the good fight πŸ™‚

  4. I always wanted to write but as I age my writing becomes less readable and more,’wtf was I trying to say?’ so keep plugging away…and be glad some crazy lady ain’t got you hid away in a cabin in the words…you know???

  5. It sounds like you have a lot going on and it’s making you feel like things like the blog aren’t good enough.
    I enjoy reading your blog (when I get a chance to actually read it).
    C.x

    1. That’s definitely true – I feel like this blog reflects me a lot of the time, so when I feel kinda swamped with work (in a good way) I tend to write crappier or more stressed posts.

      But thank you! It’s good to know that people are still finding things worth reading πŸ™‚

      1. I’m the same. When I first started blogging I wanted each post to be perfect. Now I just write.

        Your stuff is definitely still worth reading πŸ™‚ keep going. Hopefully things calm down a bit soon.

        C.x

        1. I hope they don’t! I like doing all these things, even if it’s annoying sometimes.

          But I totally get what you mean re. perfection – my first post honestly took me hours, this one was a 10-minute job :’)

          1. Okay, well I hope you can relax and not worry about trying to make everything perfect so you can actually enjoy what you’re doing.
            C.x

  6. I’ve been feeling this way lately, too. Have 5K words of a novel – going well so far, but highly doubtful to be published until a few years, if at all, what with lack of money and resources. Recently decided to consider submitting stories to magazines to earn a bit of money, save it, yet haven’t even started writing the first; fear of rejection, leads to, like you, nothing of value or a scrap of a platform. I suppose, though, if you enjoy it that much, keep at it, you’ll find something in the end. You seem to be with your novel (congratulations on 50K, by the way), and it sounds worthwhile. If some things are going well, I wouldn’t say it’s a terrible thing that some others suffer slightly.

    But like the others say, try mixing it up a bit. Break down the tasks into certain days? Perhaps it’s become overwhelming so it makes some aspects of your writing suffer.

    This comment probably made no sense whatsoever. Apologies.

    1. I like the overwhelming thing though – makes me feel like I’m actually being productive. And gods know I have no realistic ambitious of ever making money from writing – I’ll probably spend my degree working on never-to-be-published novels, before bombing out with a crap grade and working for a local PR company. It’s get poor or die trying!

      But congrats on your 5,000! That’s 5,000 more words than most people have written, and 5,000 more than if you never started. If you’re worried about fear of rejection, maybe publish on your own terms, either through self-publishing or just sticking things you write on a blog. I’ve written daily posts for so long that a negative response to my work doesn’t matter to me at all – I just write, and if people like it they do, and if they don’t I’ll write something else pretty soon anyway.

      1. Good advice! I am warming more the idea of self-publishing, mainly because of time lengths and less restrictions on the actual content. Ah, well, that’s an interesting way of working – and your way, so fair enough! You never know, though, you may find success in writing. If it is your dream, I hope it comes true one day. πŸ™‚

        1. If dreams come true they’re no longer dreams – I quite like the idea of an unobtainable goal, it offers endless motivation. And I’ve honestly not looked at self-publishing because I’m still focusing on the writing aspect of things.

          No worries πŸ™‚ I’m not knowledgable, but I like to pretend I am.

          1. You know, now that you’ve said that, I quite like the idea of it too. I’m going to use that for motivation from now on. So – thank you!

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